Game quotes! Again!

[zephyrofgod]

Yes, more game quotes. We've been more prolific as of late, but, due to my crappy records, I'm sure I'm mixing weeks around. It's still funny, though.

The cast this week:
Blessed Virgin Gnome, post-partum.
The Kobold Paladin
The Bugbear Rogue
The Dragonbron Cleric
The Bender
The DM


DM: "Doing math. Doing math. File not found. Processing."

Kobold: "Bender, you have Final Fantasy Disease."

Bender: "On the next episode of DragonBall Z, the kobold is still rolling damage!"

Kobold: "I want a deus ex machina gun!"

Bender: "We're going to need the infernal Yellow Pages now."

DM: "...Bastion of Unborn Souls..."
Bender: "Starbucks?"

Bugbear: "Let's make him into kobold-braü, raise him, and make him drink himself!"

Dragonborn: "I imagine that I'll get a collect call someday from one of my three gods about that one guy..."
Bender: "Um...yeah. I'll need you to come in on Saturday..."

Kobold: "Stab it with your butt!"

Dragonborn: "And that's the gift that'll keep on giving."
Gnome: "Herpes?"

Bender: "It's non-Euclidean champagne."

Kobold: "I'm going to call him Caesar, as in Chicken Caesar Slaad!"

Bender, on seeing a kitchen IC covered in corpses: "I'm sure Jones Soda has a flavour for that."

Bugbear: "What you're saying is that there's a widow. Helllloooo."

Gnome: "Sucky-sucky...read book?"
DM, making face of both disbelief and horror: "Wait...what?!"